Pork It’s the Meat of Kings …

If you watch this, it will stick in your head for hours, even weeks to come. You have been warned.

I'm sick of the term "pork." It has no definition and its use in political discourse is the last bastion of the unintelligent mind. One man's pork is another man's energy grid. One woman's pork is another woman's pro-life propaganda. It's an all encompassing term to deride what you don't like ideologically. It means nothing real or relative.

"Pork barrel spending" is not the same thing as earmarks. An earmark is a more tightly defined concept whereby Congress overwrites the executive branch authority on allocating funds without ever having to identify who authored it:

Earmarking differs from the broader appropriations process, defined in the Constitution, in which Congress grants a yearly lump sum of money to a Federal agency. These monies are allocated by the agency according to its legal authority and internal budgeting process. With an earmark, Congress has given itself the ability to direct a specified amount of money from an agency's budget to be spent on a particular project, without the Members of the Congress having to identify themselves or the project.

The stimulus package is neither perfect nor laden with pork. And it's here. And it's here to stay. And yes there will be problems arising from the execution of it and yes there will be sterling successes. But the current debate about it reminds me of the intellectual capabilities of ideological teenagers who know absolutely nothing about what they argue about yet they do it so passionately.

I get that conservatives hate it on ideological grounds. You've been heard, it didn't work. No, that doesn't mean you should just shut up, but you are not contributing to the current situation. Pitch in and ensure that the money your state gets (and don't you love the Republicans who wouldn't vote for the bill clamoring for the money) is spent wisely, according to your constituents values and wishes. Do something constructive, please, because constantly referring to the laissez-faire capitalism that got us into the current situation is as annoying as living near the constant noise of an airport.

I'm currently reading a compilation of an advice columnist and I'm thinking I really should be an advice columnist. This isn't hard, at least not based on the letters that get sent in. Does anyone actually know someone who sent a letter to an advice columnist? I've never heard of such a person and wonder if they're like Oompa Loompas? Anyway, I love giving advice and have some for the people who have decided that they HATE President Obama. Not just disagree, but hate hate hate. My advice is based on experience so I know what I'm talking about. I HATED George W. Bush so I have direct experience in hating a president.

Check out. Tune out. Find a hobby other than what's going on at the national level. Seriously, it's the only way you're going to get through the next four, possibly eight years. Hating everything you see and hear the nation's president doing is exhausting. You should check back in around election times, but otherwise, you're going to be perpetually miserable. Stop reading your bubble blogs, tune out of FOX, take up knitting. Watch back episodes of Lost to remember to confuse you. Focus locally rather than nationally. Unless you are in a position to actually impact what's going on at the national stage, you are only setting yourself up for pain if you spend four years railing about Obama. I know. I've been there with Bush. I had to check out.

I-told-you-so's are hollow. They don't make you feel better. Being prescient makes you feel worse, not better. So if you're right, and everything Obama does is a spectacular failure, you won't feel better. I don't feel better that I knew the execution of the Iraq war would be a disaster; that the deregulation of the financial industry and the subprime mortgage debacle would blow up; that ridiculous credit debt would crash us all. Knowing all that years ago and being right doesn't feel better. In many ways, it feels worse because it makes you believe that the nation is stupid and who the hell wants to live in a stupid nation? So if, in your rush of hatred, you are banking on being "right" and relishing the prospect of saying I Told You So, it won't live up to your expectations. It might drive up Rush's ratings, but it do anything for your blood pressure. Just some friendly advice from someone who's been there.