We have lost our ability to envy in a healthy manner.
There is nothing wrong with being envious of the things we don’t or can’t have, if they are things we want. I believe that acknowledging that you are envious of things is a very positive thing. If you are envious of things you don’t have, that can only spur you to acquire it. If you are envious of things you can’t have, than it is healthy to acknowledge that so you can move on.
Focusing primarily on envying what you don’t have first. What is not healthy or positive is to hate the people who have what you do not. They have it, you don’t. While perfectly acceptable to hate perhaps the way someone acquired what you envy can be fine, if properly analyzed. For example, while envying the status of those in the upper echelons, I only hate the methods by which some of them acquired that status (if it be by corruption). But I don’t hate a celebrity who has acquired fame and fortune given that they have a talent that the modern world wants to pay to be displayed. I envy that they are given free designer clothes and jewelry, but don’t hate them or the designer for it. I don’t have that talent therefore I don’t have the cache for a designer to want to clothe me so that others desire that product. It’s that simple. I don’t hate Warren Buffet for being one of the richest people in the world. I’m envious of his status, his wealth, and the brains and ambition that got him there.
What has become easy and popular in America is to hate what is envied. Nowhere is this more evident than in the current tactics of the Republican party. Hate the elite, hate the Ivy League universities, hate the intellectuals. Hate the wine drinkers, the organic food eaters, the latte drinkers, the urban dwellers.
But just like it is easy to turn what is feared into what is hated, it is commonplace to denigrate that which is the higher achievement of the human condition. To study and learn; to explore culinary experiences; to have the leisure time to sit around a coffee shop and exchange ideas; to choose to live in a place that offers diversity of people, food, jobs, leisure activities; none of these are things to be hated, even if they are envied.
And at heart, I believe they are envied. Not in a way that says that these choices are better. They are better for some, and not as much for others. Many many people do not live the lifestyle constantly vilified by the GOP because they don’t want it. They prefer closer-knit communities to raise their children in. They choose lower payer careers to avoid the high-stress corporate environment. And in those choices, they give up other options that they may wish they could experience, but aren’t willing to give up what it takes to have that experience. And that’s perfectly understandable.
I oftentimes envy those with the slower-paced lifestyle and the smaller mortgage on more square footage. If I envied it to the point that it caused me grief, I could and would make the lifestyle changes necessary to make my life similar. But I understand that I made and continue to make certain choices that leads to my current lifestyle. And I’m happy with it.
I envy those who were born into great wealth and influence. But I don’t hate them for it. Luck is making the most of the opportunities presented to you. To be born with the wind instantly at your back is a great thing and something any parent would want for their children. So while I may envy those that have it, there is no point in insulting them for making the most of what they had at hand. There are far too many examples of those who made tough choices and find themselves in the same position as those to the manor born. So anyone who wants to be there, but isn’t, is where they are because of the choices they made. Maybe they didn’t want to go into debt to go to the better college (or to college at all). Maybe they didn’t want to give up some fun or relaxation in their younger years to focus on the activities that pave the way to scholarships or internships or entry-level jobs that lead to corporate/political power. But to hate those that did, because at heart you are envious, is one of the worst forms of dishonesty.
It’s what can’t be had that primarily drives me in my social/political beliefs. Every day we discover more and more about how the circumstances of our early upbringing set the foundation for our futures. A child born into lower means, fed insubstantial or sub-standard food, given no positives to model themselves after, and who is poorly educated, frankly doesn’t have much of a shot in this world. Fast food or food loaded with preservatives is not nutritious, but it is cheap. Community organization can provide many positive role models and should not be sneered at on the national stage. Schools funded by the property taxes of low income neighborhoods will not be good, but families cannot move to where the good schools are.
These people have every right to be envious of those who have. And therefore it is my firm belief that those who have have a duty to develop the socio-economic infrastructure to eradicate these differences. The current Democratic base of wealthier and more educated individuals is proving that as well. The current GOP-thinking is that a free market will provide all of that. Simply put, it hasn’t and won’t. The GOP has good ideas in some areas (school vouchers isn’t a bad idea, but does nothing to fix the base problem which is underfunding and under investment in our education system), but have been incredibly inept at implementing any of them.
What’s very strange to me is that the current conservative base is not poor nor developmentally challenged the way people who live in urban poverty are. And yet, they hate what they don’t have, but could have if they wanted. And if they don’t want it, why hate those that do? If these people would simply apply rationality to their own thought processes, they might realize how idiotic they make themselves to be when they disparage education, intelligence, and eclectic and experimental tastes. Those things are better. Period. Anyone of these small-town-values loving people can still be educated, intelligent, and cosmopolitan in their tastes while still loving whatever it is about small-town-values they … well value.
Understanding the inner green-eyed monster could go a long way to clearing up the current state of public discourse that deals only in extremes and vitriol hurled back and forth across the political, economic, and social divide.
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